This was the day I was dreading when I would look at Chloe and decide that the dementia had robbed me of so much of my little dog and made her life one of distress and confusion. Even though the thought had crossed my mind on numerous occasions over the past year and I’d discussed ‘that day’ with the Vet it didn’t make it any easier to make that phone call and take our last journey together. We had our final cuddle and smooch outside in the sunshine and I was there to the end. Devastated is an understatement to describe how I feel but there’s an element of relief in knowing that the condition that had chipped away at her brain can’t hurt her anymore and she’s in a better place. The last of The Ninja’s is no more but she made a big impression on everybody who met her and she was there for me through all of the good and bad when the majority of people turned out to be a letdown. For that I am eternally grateful. The van is too quiet without her and her stuff is still lying around and will stay where it is until I can bear to put it away. She is being cremated with her beloved piece of ‘manky sheep’ blanket and her ‘hot dog’ water bottle cover. The lovely people at Kings Hill didn’t bat an eyelid but then I guess they see all sorts. This was the dog I held in my hands at 1 day old, whose tail never stopped wagging even when she slept, who would ‘die’ so that my Mum could stroke her belly with her walking stick, who would come and sit on you if you were upset even if it was only down to a weepy film, who would lie on her back while I played Meatloaf’s ‘Dead Ringer for Love’ on her belly, who would lie across my Mum when she was crocheting one of her marathon baby shawls, who loved going to Starbucks every Sunday in the car with Roo and Pixie for coffee and cake,who was happily spoon fed Crunchy Nut Cornflakes and milk for breakfast every morning and who I smooched around the van with singing Biffy Clyro’s ‘Many of Horror’ to which she didn’t appreciate and I’d get a smack in the face with a Ninja paw.
Sleep tight my angel I miss you x