Time Travel is possible. I achieved it today by getting on a bus in Wolvey and going to Nuneaton for urgent ‘can’t get at the supermarket’ supplies. Public transport is harrowing enough – vile gobby teenagers, OAP’s, a woman who appeared to be dressed as Big Daddy (the wrestler) and the local Army wives, then you get into the bus station and it’s like going back 20 years. I’ve only been left the hell hole one year today (loud cheer) but my gawd the place just sinks further into the abyss. Crowds of Chavs and In-breds – they’re the ones with wonky features and no teeth, pregnant teens, obese bodies who make the Yanks look Anorexic and swarms of people on mobility scooters!! They seem to travel in packs so I can only presume they’re too damn lazy to walk. I managed to get what I needed and be on the next bus out within the hour – breathing a huge sigh of relief. If ever Iran or Korea want to test their nuclear weapons then give me a call and I’ll email you Nuneaton’s GPS co-ordinates with pleasure.
On a lighter note, the big news story this week has been the true identity of Top Gears Stig. Well I can quash those stories and tell you it isn’t Ben Collins but Kath the Travel de Courcey bus driver we had on the way home. Judging by the way that woman broke the sound barrier with a 40 seater bus round the lanes then tear arsing round the TG track in a Ferrari/Zonda/Aston Martin would be a cinch.